Breakfast At The Beach with Tyler Christopher

Pimped Out Cabs

If I see one more cab with low profile tires outfitted with $4000 rims I’m going to quit acting and have a sex change then change back to a man again. That’s how ridiculous it is. I was on a hike in Austin on Tuesday and on my way back outside of the Hotel I see a shiny cab, freshly polished and waxed waiting for it’s next victim. As I pan down to the “shoes” what do I see? 20” tires with enough Armour All on them to shine the floors of the TaJ Mahal accompanied with five spoke chrome rims to match. ON A CAB! Even on a beat up Impala you’re still kind of a douche but on a cab? Come on. Does he think that because of his vehicular lingerie I will have a slow motion moment where my hair blows in the wind to the theme song from Ferris Buehlers Day Off and say to myself, “I must ride four blocks in that cab.” I can see it now – me bumping my head to DMX with the windows down on my way to the club in a tricked out yellow cab that actually says, “yellow cab” on the side. Oh the simple pleasures in life.

Ty Christopher

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